25 Days of Christmas Movies: Day 2 Home Alone 2: Lost in New York

 

Well. Here we are. Day Two. And to quote John Mulaney, "How did you get lost in New York? It's a grid system!" To be fair, if I were, like Kevin McCallister, lost in an unfamiliar, major city at age 9, I would not so much take in the sights as have a breakdown and be put into the hands of Child Protective Services so fast I wouldn't have made it out of the airport. 

Let me clear up one thing from yesterday's post, I, mistakenly, thought that the Wet Bandits were set free in the sequel, having served their time. Not that they had escaped, as the poster itself says outright. I thought that they served surprisingly short sentences (something I planned on railing against here today) and had completely forgotten they were fugitives in the second. That being said, the fact that these two idiots somehow managed to escape from custody is the most unlikely thing in the sequel, and that includes Marv taking multiple bricks to the face.

Yesterday I bagged on Frank a bit, deservedly. Today I come for Buzz. He reminds me of Biff from Back to the Future. A tormentor with a tiny bit of cleverness, just enough to get away with most of what he does, and a mean streak that gets a little meaner with certain someones. The fact that their parents don't come down hard on Buzz... I mean, as an older sibling myself, I gotta say if I did that in public to one of my little siblings and then was pushed, no matter how silver-tongued my apology may have seemed, I would have been the one in trouble. And no, Buzz's little speech at the end around the tree does not redeem him.

Let's be clear, These parents are the most unobservant people in the world. How they can be that oblivious and have careers that afford a house like that is beyond me. In the first film, the blame on leaving Kevin falls on both parents equally. Like, count your children people. Really. But in this one its all the dad. He had his son running right behind him in one of the busiest airports in the country and he's not looking back to check and see that his youngest child is still with them. All the blame and shame on dad. Dishonour on him. Dishonour on his cow!

Now lets talk about Kevin. This kid has more confidence at nine than I do at thirty-three. His con game puts Frank Abagnale to shame. Conning his way into the Plaza, into the limo with the cheese pizza, into the entire hotel staff being terrified. Truly a grifter's grifter. Sure, they eventually find him out but if he were even a few years older he would have been able to pull it off entirely. Also, I've never seen a pizza look better in my life than when Rob Schneider opens the lid and that steam puffs out. That looks like a pie worthy of the name. 

I really like--and I always do--the story with pigeon-lady. I think it is a much better old person friend for Kevin than shovel-man. (It sounds like he's collecting Avengers rejects.) But the stuff with pigeon-lady is great. Highlighting how the people that society ostracizes are still people. Capable and worthy of the same things that all of us are; security, understanding, community. It is a really great way to slip such a great message into a kids movie. Not hitting you over the head with it but a gentle pointing of the way.

Are we sure that Harry and Marv aren't demi-gods? Are they superheroes? They are able to take a surprising amount of punishment and still bounce back. I know, I know. It's all movie magic and suspension of disbelief but I'd be willing to bet that any mortal who undergoes the pain these men do would die many times over. The bricks alone would be, at the very least, coma inducing. With the bricks and the electrocution, Marv takes an absolute beating this time around. Not that being blown up is by any means an easy time for Harry.

I really like the running gag of  It's a Wonderful Life between the first two films. In the Home Alone, the family goes to Paris and watch the movie dubbed in French. In HA2: Lost in New York, they go to Miami where they watch it dubbed in Spanish. A tiny bit but one I appreciate. 

All in all this is a great movie and a stellar sequel. It uses the events of the first film while being reliant on none it for the story. The bar was raised, the pratfalls were even prattier, and the newly named Sticky Bandits live to be outsmarted by a elementary schooler another day. 

8.2/10 Steamy Cheese Pizzas.

I'll see you tomorrow, when the film will be Polar Express.

JK